A Vegan Perspective on the Prefect BBQ

The Prefect BBQ is an annual event, held to raise money for charity. Following this year's BBQ, on May 22, I talked to a couple of Prefects who had been involved in running it, telling them that I was writing a story for our official school newspaper, the Woodchips.

HTP: So was the BBQ a big success?

Mark Elkins: Yeah.

HTP: Did you sell a llot of hamburgers and stuff?

Prefect 2: Best ever. Combining it with the Carnival really helped.

HTP: But I was wondering- All that meat you sold, do you feel bad about profiting from the suffering of animals?

ME: We had Nachos for vegetarians, if they have a problem.

HTP: But animals still suffered. Like I hear sometimes they kill them while they're still alive. (laughter)

ME: If everybody had a big problem with it, why did they buy the hamburgers?

HTP: But still, isn't that sort of like what Hitler could say- If people didn't like all the killing of the Jews and Gypsies and such then why did they help us out? Eh? Because people just go along with flow. You're the ring leaders of this. You're directly supporting the oppression of animals.

ME: Don, you're hilarious.

P2: That shirt you're wearing right now was made in a sweat shop in China.

HTP: I know.

P2: So what do you think of the oppression involved in that? Are you going to come to school naked now? No.

HTP: So you because there's oppression behind everything oppression is OK?

P2: Perhaps...

ME: Huh? What are you talking about now?

HTP: He's just saying how my shirt equals oppression, and I'm saying your meat is oppression. So he's saying everything is oppression...

ME: I hate to tell you, but almost everybody eats meat..

P2: Nothing wrong with Vegetarians. I'm trying to become one..

ME: Vegetarian; its alright, but if you like your meat you like your meat.

HTP: So do you think God has given us domain over the animals to do whatever we want with them?

P2: No, Its just that Man has no self-discipline.

HTP: Like say it was OK to eat dogs. Would you be cooking dog meat here?

ME: If people would buy it.. (more laughter) Right, you know what, if society will buy something than somebody is going to be selling it, whether its us or its somebody else.

HTP: So all the profit from the BBQ is going to charity...

ME: Look at this (points to dunk tank) This water torture tank you have. People are paying to torture their teachers...

HTP: But people are volunteering to go into that. You don't see animals volunteering to be killed..

ME: They walk into the slaughter house, don't they?

HTP: But anyway, do you know which charity the money from the BBQ goes to?

ME: I'm not sure.

HTP: I have a suggestion. I think you should give the money to the Zapatistas in Mexico, so they can buy weapons to fight the Mexican government, considering the Mexican theme you have for your BBQ.

ME: Generally we don't support political or military groups.

HTP: But you're just cashing in on the Mexican image, so maybe you should give something back to the people of Mexico. (silence)

HTP: I mean with you sombrero hats, and your nachos, and with calling the thing Fiesta, I just think it would be a nice gesture...

ME: See the funny thing is, how much money is the SAC giving?

HTP: They could buy a few machine guns with that money.

ME: Yeah, but why doesn't the SAC support the Mexicans, and we'll just worry about the local..

HTP: They have machine guns made out of wood, they aren't even real machine guns, and they're fighting guys with tanks and stuff, its not fair.

ME: How did we get onto Mexicans? And like Mexican guerrillas, really they have nothing to do with the BBQ.

HTP: But you called the thing Fiesta, and you have this Mexican theme, its like you're profiting from Mexican culture and you should give something back to the people of Mexico.

ME: Huh?

HTP: Well it's like you're profiting from their culture by using it to promote your BBQ...

ME: The whole world's copying our culture..

HTP: But they're not profiting from it.

ME: Like they don't make money off the Nike symbol. They don't give anything back to us, they just want to buy the Nike symbol. That's world wide.

P2: Mark, Mark, Mark (gestures to indicate they should leave)

HTP: What about culture stereotypes you're perpetuating. The happy guy in the sombrero...

ME: What's the point of this interview?

HTP: The point is that I was lying when I said it was for the Woodchips. The fact that I was openly lying in saying that is, I think, is ironic on a number of different levels.