He is just a Dog Guy


by Mike Jones

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Ask Dog Guy:

He is just a dog guy.

  1. Who is Dog Guy?
    Why do you want to know?
  2. Is Dog Guy really smart or really stupid?
    Really stupid.
  3. Is he really smart, but just pretending to be really stupid?
    No, not at all. He's really quite stupid.
  4. But is it all, like, a big trick? Like is he really just planning something really diabolical, but he has to keep everyone thinking he's 'just a dog guy'?
    I get this all the time. No, actually not at all. There's no trick. He's just dumb.
  5. Like that janitor from Disturbing Behaviour.. he acted all stupid.. but really, he was really smart. And at the end he saved everyone by driving off that cliff..
    Thanks for spoiling the movie for me, jack-ass.
  6. Oh, sorry. Ok, well, really you still get to see Katie Holmes, so just chill. Ok. Is there anything you want to say to all the Dog Guy fans out there?
    Stepping on LEGO is the most painful thing a human can experience. It really, really hurts.

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